Everyone has witnessed something momentous in their lifetimes, but a part of me feels this is something I should say now.
I'm 22, going on 23, I've been alive during many historic moments, I turned 1 the day the Berlin Wall fell, I was in school or daycare when the OJ Simpson trial happened, I heard Bil Clinton say "I did not have sexual relations with this woman" a million times on the news but I wasn't aware of that. I've been alive when things happened in other countries that were big and I'm still just looking into these events.
I became much more socially aware when a few kids shot of their high school when I was still in elementary school. A few years later religious radicals took down the World Trade Center. I was in seventh grade in the middle of class and kids were being pulled from school by their parents. I don't remember if my day officially ended early, or if I just went home with barely whispered rumors filling in what happened. It's the only thing that was on television that afternoon, it stopped America in it's tracks. People fretted and mourned, there was chaos and confusion. The Pentagon had been hit (between few and several) miles from where I was in school, from where I lived.
At some point there were the DC snipers and Bush sent troops West to find and destroy Al-Qaeda. The troops stayed West and things happened. I apparently wasn't all that aware if I can't tell you what happened for about 6 years, school happened an my mother died things I remember but don't make history. Someone attempts to destroy the British Underground, but doesn't quite succeed. Gay marriage is an important political topic of discussion and wed is decriminalized. I'm older and go off to college and vote for the first time and a black man becomes President of the United States of America, something that has always been possible but somehow not plausible for Americans to accept.
An oil spill fucks over the environment and the oppressed rise up over dictatorships and the nation stops when the celebrities die but that last has always happened. The earth itself rises up to remind humanity that they are not the greatest and that superficial differences ought be forgot and people send aid to New Orleans, Haiti and Japan. Racism is alive and well in America, even as people act like old racist symbols aren't racist, but they totally are. I'm focused on my non historic finals and classes when Osama Bin Laden is taken out.
In ten years, a few months shy of the 10th Anniversary of the WTC going down the man we were told was pretty much Enemy Number One has been killed. The nation revels in the death of one, someone who has been Othered to the point of being a concept and less a person. I can say I heard the information, then went to sleep. I think this is something that people need a moment to absorb, things are going to be interesting for a minute. I don't know. I just wrote this. Maybe I'll continue to write about historic moments when they happen, but you really don't know if something will be big until it's been years, but I think that waiting hours is fair for something like this.
Jasmine P.
Showing posts with label present. Show all posts
Showing posts with label present. Show all posts
May 2, 2011
November 4, 2010
Journals and Journal Comics
I just finished reading Craig Thompson's Carnet de Voyage, it was a journal comic and sketchbook he wrote over a 2 month period when he was on a comic tour and vacation in 2004. At the end of the book he talks about why he did it. He talks about his motivation to draw it and his trepidation about selling his sketches and a journal. It made me think about why I like reading diaries and journal comics, and why I did my own journal comic.
I am a nosy person. In the past I've gone through bathroom cabinets, purses, wallets, bags, pockets, rooms, cellphones, anything. I'm curious about other people. The things people keep in their wallets, the stories the items tell and the explanations their owners give. Items in a way, tell what someone finds important. IN my own wallet right now I have one dollar, my campus ID, my driver's license, my bank card, a membership card for Local Heroes, my social security card, a copy of my savings and checking account numbers, insurance cards, an expired bank card and a few other scraps. The sweatshirt I wore today has my wallet, phone, cigarettes, two lighters, two pens, scraps of paper, some garbage, and pain killers, it had my laptop and mp3 player in it earlier. My bag has ball point pens, inking pens, mechanical pencils, a set of Derwitt drawing pencils, two sketchbooks, two novels, one comic, hand lotion, some candy and probably garbage and loose pain killers.
Those items tell you I enjoy drawing, reading, I smoke, I don't remember my banking numbers, I like comics, I either don't carry cash or I have no cash. That's a lot of things to learn from not talking to me and just going through my things. I think that's why on dA the room meme or bag meme goes on, people are interested in what people keep with them. On formspring I've gotten the question 'what's in your pocket right now' a few times, people are curious about what people keep with them. I think that why I enjoy reading journals and diary comics, to see how others live.
As I was reading Carnet I was thinking about how I'd draw a different journal comic than 100 Days, I want to do another one at some point, maybe this spring. I've been thinking about limiting it to interesting events, but anything can come up, I don't know yet.
Carnet was interesting because of how personal it is. On the last page when Thompson is talking about why he did it, even with the pressure from his publisher, a friend told him he should draw it for himself. I went that route with 100 Days, but I think I may try something different with the last 50 or so pages that I haven't finished yet, in a way make them more personal, even though some days get incredibly personal. I don't know, I might save those ideas for another journal comic.
Some other Internet journal comics I've enjoyed are Dar, Ellerbisms, The Everyday, Journalin' Comix, Johnny Wander, Kid with Experience, Little Gamers, So Far Apart, Three Panel Soul and I'm sure I've got others I'm forgetting. Some published autobio comics I've enjoyed are Will Eisner's work, Blankets, Spent, Too Cool To Be Forgotten, Persepolis, Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic, and all the ones I can't see from my perch on my bed. Some biographies and published journals I've enjoyed are David Carradine's Kill Bill Diary, Room Full of Mirrors, everything I've read by Jonathan Ames, and as before, what I can't see form my perch on my bed. I really like being able to peek in at different people's lives, see how they live, what's important to them and how they change over time.
I think part of that was my motivation for 100 Days, to be able to look back at what my life was for a summer when I was 21. To see times when I was happy, what I enjoyed doing, watching, reading and then being able to reflect on things. Even now I find it enjoyable to look at what I did only three months ago, some of these pages I haven't seen in months so I've forgotten what I did, how I felt. Sometimes I get swept away by my own emotions, falling into a mild depression because of what I did that day or remembering happy days. It's been interesting and good I think. I don't regret drawing this out, I don't regret posting it online, I don't really regret anything I said there either. I do have a moleskin sketchbook/journal that's a larger format waiting for something to be put in it, I might use that for my next one. We'll see. Maybe I'll have a reason to start it earlier.
Jasmine P.
I am a nosy person. In the past I've gone through bathroom cabinets, purses, wallets, bags, pockets, rooms, cellphones, anything. I'm curious about other people. The things people keep in their wallets, the stories the items tell and the explanations their owners give. Items in a way, tell what someone finds important. IN my own wallet right now I have one dollar, my campus ID, my driver's license, my bank card, a membership card for Local Heroes, my social security card, a copy of my savings and checking account numbers, insurance cards, an expired bank card and a few other scraps. The sweatshirt I wore today has my wallet, phone, cigarettes, two lighters, two pens, scraps of paper, some garbage, and pain killers, it had my laptop and mp3 player in it earlier. My bag has ball point pens, inking pens, mechanical pencils, a set of Derwitt drawing pencils, two sketchbooks, two novels, one comic, hand lotion, some candy and probably garbage and loose pain killers.
Those items tell you I enjoy drawing, reading, I smoke, I don't remember my banking numbers, I like comics, I either don't carry cash or I have no cash. That's a lot of things to learn from not talking to me and just going through my things. I think that's why on dA the room meme or bag meme goes on, people are interested in what people keep with them. On formspring I've gotten the question 'what's in your pocket right now' a few times, people are curious about what people keep with them. I think that why I enjoy reading journals and diary comics, to see how others live.
As I was reading Carnet I was thinking about how I'd draw a different journal comic than 100 Days, I want to do another one at some point, maybe this spring. I've been thinking about limiting it to interesting events, but anything can come up, I don't know yet.
Carnet was interesting because of how personal it is. On the last page when Thompson is talking about why he did it, even with the pressure from his publisher, a friend told him he should draw it for himself. I went that route with 100 Days, but I think I may try something different with the last 50 or so pages that I haven't finished yet, in a way make them more personal, even though some days get incredibly personal. I don't know, I might save those ideas for another journal comic.
Some other Internet journal comics I've enjoyed are Dar, Ellerbisms, The Everyday, Journalin' Comix, Johnny Wander, Kid with Experience, Little Gamers, So Far Apart, Three Panel Soul and I'm sure I've got others I'm forgetting. Some published autobio comics I've enjoyed are Will Eisner's work, Blankets, Spent, Too Cool To Be Forgotten, Persepolis, Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic, and all the ones I can't see from my perch on my bed. Some biographies and published journals I've enjoyed are David Carradine's Kill Bill Diary, Room Full of Mirrors, everything I've read by Jonathan Ames, and as before, what I can't see form my perch on my bed. I really like being able to peek in at different people's lives, see how they live, what's important to them and how they change over time.
I think part of that was my motivation for 100 Days, to be able to look back at what my life was for a summer when I was 21. To see times when I was happy, what I enjoyed doing, watching, reading and then being able to reflect on things. Even now I find it enjoyable to look at what I did only three months ago, some of these pages I haven't seen in months so I've forgotten what I did, how I felt. Sometimes I get swept away by my own emotions, falling into a mild depression because of what I did that day or remembering happy days. It's been interesting and good I think. I don't regret drawing this out, I don't regret posting it online, I don't really regret anything I said there either. I do have a moleskin sketchbook/journal that's a larger format waiting for something to be put in it, I might use that for my next one. We'll see. Maybe I'll have a reason to start it earlier.
Jasmine P.
May 23, 2010
Concepts of Beauty
My Grandmother keeps trying to get me to change what I like about myself. We're supposed to be going on a cruise this August around the Bahamas. When I spoke to her last week she told me what it was like on the boat, "you're going to forget you're on a boat, it's like being in a mall' or she'd tell me about the Governer's Ball which happens one night on the ship, and that I have to be dressed nicely for dinner. I'm like 'alright' and she continues asking me if I'm going to 'get my hair done' or wear earrings, or telling me I can't wear denims, she's old and doesn't usually say 'jeans' for whatever reason.
I try to listen, but when she asks me an honest question I decide I'm going to answer honestly:
-"Will you get my hair done in a beauty salon": no, I like my hair short and natural
-"well, will you go to a barber? How much does it cost?"; between $10-15, and no, my friend can cut my hair;
-"how do you know they can cut hair? What if you don't like it?": I'll cut it all off then let it grow back. Hair will grow back.
-"You're not going to wear a hat every day, your hair won't grow long if you wear a hat all the time.": I like my hats and I don't want my hair to grow long, Grandma.
-"Fine, you're going to wear earrings right?": No Grandma, they irritate my ears, I don't like 'em. As I kid I didn't like them.
"Well, you have to dress nice, you can't go out to eat wearing denims. When you go out with your friends you have to look nice so you can meet people."
You'd think I'd be dizzy from rolling my eyes so much. I finally get her to stop this ridiculous attempt at changing me by explaining I wear and present myself how I like. I don't like dresses or earrings so I don't wear them. I like my hats so I wear them. I have the commonsense to not go to a nice dinner in baggy messy jeans or cargos, but it's the same commonsense that keeps me from going to a messy art class in a really nice shirt. It's neither the time nor is it the place. No, I won't wear make-up, no I won't conform to society's conventions of beauty because I don't like them.
I am me, let me prove to you my life is fine, that I'm happy, when I'm not depressed - my appearance doesn't affect my depression, so I'm happy in how I look, how I dress and ow I carry myself. I have been told that things I have ae nice, that they look good, stop trying to compare me to my mother. Stop trying to compare me to other people, be happy that I'm happy.
I don't know. I could easily just say yes to everything she says I should do, but I wouldn't be happy. It's better to get this stupid non-important argument out of the way now instead of it being a stupid non-important argument in three months when sh sees me to wearing earrings, not wearing make-up, not wearing nail polish. I'll primp to my own tastes not hers. The thing is, like I said, I like how I dress, I like the clothes I wear, I don't want to 'work' that goes into being 'beautiful' and that shit all costs too much. Concealer, mascara, lipstick, blush, facial wash, zit cream, nail polish, nail polish remover, hair rollers, hair relaxant. If I had one of each of those things I'd've spent $100 easy. Why? To fit into what society considers to be beautiful. I want to buck trends and fuck convention.
It's like I questioned in this image http://dichigo.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d1kcwn9 a scribble from a few years ago, I want to go back to it again at some point, but why should I listen to the magazines, the voices outside. To hell with them, if I'm happy how I am, why do I have to listen to people out there who work so hard to change themselves and others to their own conventions and beauty, to what they think society would like. No, that's not me.
When I leave for that cruise I will have some nice shirts, I will have one or two skirts, I will also have sneakers, sandals, denim gouchos, one or two of my hats, either my FreakAngels or Israeli Paratrooper bag, at least one sketchbook, pens, pencils, two or three novels and my DS, plus other odds and ends. I'll have things to look nice in, to look nice with that I like, and I'll have the things I like that are comfortable. It's what I like
Jasmine P.
I try to listen, but when she asks me an honest question I decide I'm going to answer honestly:
-"Will you get my hair done in a beauty salon": no, I like my hair short and natural
-"well, will you go to a barber? How much does it cost?"; between $10-15, and no, my friend can cut my hair;
-"how do you know they can cut hair? What if you don't like it?": I'll cut it all off then let it grow back. Hair will grow back.
-"You're not going to wear a hat every day, your hair won't grow long if you wear a hat all the time.": I like my hats and I don't want my hair to grow long, Grandma.
-"Fine, you're going to wear earrings right?": No Grandma, they irritate my ears, I don't like 'em. As I kid I didn't like them.
"Well, you have to dress nice, you can't go out to eat wearing denims. When you go out with your friends you have to look nice so you can meet people."
You'd think I'd be dizzy from rolling my eyes so much. I finally get her to stop this ridiculous attempt at changing me by explaining I wear and present myself how I like. I don't like dresses or earrings so I don't wear them. I like my hats so I wear them. I have the commonsense to not go to a nice dinner in baggy messy jeans or cargos, but it's the same commonsense that keeps me from going to a messy art class in a really nice shirt. It's neither the time nor is it the place. No, I won't wear make-up, no I won't conform to society's conventions of beauty because I don't like them.
I am me, let me prove to you my life is fine, that I'm happy, when I'm not depressed - my appearance doesn't affect my depression, so I'm happy in how I look, how I dress and ow I carry myself. I have been told that things I have ae nice, that they look good, stop trying to compare me to my mother. Stop trying to compare me to other people, be happy that I'm happy.
I don't know. I could easily just say yes to everything she says I should do, but I wouldn't be happy. It's better to get this stupid non-important argument out of the way now instead of it being a stupid non-important argument in three months when sh sees me to wearing earrings, not wearing make-up, not wearing nail polish. I'll primp to my own tastes not hers. The thing is, like I said, I like how I dress, I like the clothes I wear, I don't want to 'work' that goes into being 'beautiful' and that shit all costs too much. Concealer, mascara, lipstick, blush, facial wash, zit cream, nail polish, nail polish remover, hair rollers, hair relaxant. If I had one of each of those things I'd've spent $100 easy. Why? To fit into what society considers to be beautiful. I want to buck trends and fuck convention.
It's like I questioned in this image http://dichigo.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d1kcwn9 a scribble from a few years ago, I want to go back to it again at some point, but why should I listen to the magazines, the voices outside. To hell with them, if I'm happy how I am, why do I have to listen to people out there who work so hard to change themselves and others to their own conventions and beauty, to what they think society would like. No, that's not me.
When I leave for that cruise I will have some nice shirts, I will have one or two skirts, I will also have sneakers, sandals, denim gouchos, one or two of my hats, either my FreakAngels or Israeli Paratrooper bag, at least one sketchbook, pens, pencils, two or three novels and my DS, plus other odds and ends. I'll have things to look nice in, to look nice with that I like, and I'll have the things I like that are comfortable. It's what I like
Jasmine P.
March 15, 2009
A Sea of Dire Straits
I really do have too much fun with non-sequitor titles, and my room is cold. Time to return the apartment temperature to it's proper 70 deg. place, then to continue on my post-op life :)
--
One minute later...
damn, that wasn't the apartment, that was me...which is probably a bad thing. Let's check our temperature. 99.1. Not the most worrisome thing, but I'll keep an eye on it, and I guess I'll take a short nap. I mean, I just took some ibuprofen about twenty minutes ago, so that's still working on kicking in.
Considering I can't remember where I left off, another moment or two to see what I last spoke about. :) So I drifted from Thursday night to Saturday morning. I'll write about trying to sleep then onto Friday, for reals.
-----
Sleeping in the hospital was hell, like always for me. Too many damn lights, and I'm supposed to sleep on my back? Friggin' impossible. So I try sleeping seriously around eleven and wake up around one. Knowing sleep won't be easy for me, I just chill and watch some King of the Hill, the beginning of an episode I'd watched the end of prior to sleep. I listened to some random SMod while sleeping and laughed at the stories that the gents shared. I woke up every few hours, once to pee, the other times to just try to lay back and get comfortable again. Dr. Reed came in arounf 6:30am and checked the bandages and spoke with me for a minute. I can't remember what he said, but I relaxed and watched a little bit of Wings before trying to sleep again. This time, aroung 7:30 Dr. Noorbakhsh came in, looked at the bandages and told me I'd be able to leave in a few hours.
I just chilled and watched TV alternately between listening to SMod until breakfast. Eating sucked because they hadn't given me any pain killers and my throat hurt from a tube they stuck down it during surgery. Aroung 10 they gave me some nampersin and after than the pain deminished. Dad and Pattie got to the hospital around 10:30 and I was back in the apartment by about noon. We dropped off the 'scrip and continued back to Powhatan where I told the guys of my inability to sleep. We chatted and Miguel and Dorien hung out with me when Dad and Pattie left to pick up the meds. I ate some lasagna slowly, as my throat still hurt, and didn't move much for about an hour. The guys left aroung 1, Dad and Pattie aoung 1:30 then I was alone and watched a coupl-a flicks.
Elizabeth came over around 4 and we chatted until 6, at which time I tok more drugs and watched more movies. Around nine something the Midget-bitch came back and that irritated me. I went to bed around 11 and slept awkwardly. Aroung 4:30 I woke up needing to pee, but was so afraid of tearing out my sutures that I waited too long and peed on my leg which was distressing and I was tired. It was a lot of pee, and I was more worried about blood because at an earlier time when I'd gone to the bathroom one of my healing wounds kept bleeding, just slowly dripping blood. I didn't want to see more blood falling from me so I stalled. Eventually I peed and one of the giand bandage pads I was given fell into the toilet, so I had to get that before flushing the toilet. I ended up making a sign to tell the Midget-bitch not to use the bathroom until I could clean the floor because I was in no state to clean that damn floor at no 5 in the morning.
I took some more drugs and went back to bed. I woke around 11 and ate more lasagna and took some more pain killers and sat high on the couch for at least 3 hours. I had no concept of time. Pretty awesome though. Watched more movies and tried typing which was idiotic because what I wrote made no sense. Still pretty fun. It was a pleasant lazy day I was typing description for dA, so I uploaded a few inked pictures and sketches that I want to color and just chilled. That evening I finally gave my stitches a good look and they didn't look as bad as I was thinking. They weren't really painful either, but I was also riding some painkiler or another so I couldn't feel pain, even if I wanted to.
I didn't do much and went to bed. Sunday, today, I woke up and made myself breakfast. Eggs, bacon and toast before sitting on the couch and watching Zack and Miri Make a Porno. Still amused by this movie. It's also been interesitng to see Kevin Smith's writing evolve, and his accpetance of ad-libbing. Back during Clerks, they stuck to the script, and now during Z&M they were riffing and it made it in. Maybe part of that, but I didn't notice his conversations coming out as much. Mallrats had some serious Clerks style conversations going on, but none of the rest of the Jersey Triliogy[even if there are 6 and not 3] seemed to have that going, not even ClerksII. I missed his clever writing, but I could appreciate it during Jersey Girl, which I don't understand why people didn't like it. I could see it being difficult to market, but it's a good movie in it's own right. I don't regret buying any of these movies and they've been an awesome way to relax for the weekend as I've been resting after my surgery.
I finished Z&M and watched the Making Of doc, and some of the features before decided I ought to read my english stuff, but opting to write a bit instead. Nothing hard hitting, just my life and what not.
I'm now going to take a nap, and I'll take care of things later. English and psych, and I jsut realized that I forgot to interview my brother's for my psych homework, I'll ask them it over the phone or something. I dunno. It's not due until Friday, so I have some time to take care of it. Rest first, work later. :)
Jasmine P.
--
One minute later...
damn, that wasn't the apartment, that was me...which is probably a bad thing. Let's check our temperature. 99.1. Not the most worrisome thing, but I'll keep an eye on it, and I guess I'll take a short nap. I mean, I just took some ibuprofen about twenty minutes ago, so that's still working on kicking in.
Considering I can't remember where I left off, another moment or two to see what I last spoke about. :) So I drifted from Thursday night to Saturday morning. I'll write about trying to sleep then onto Friday, for reals.
-----
Sleeping in the hospital was hell, like always for me. Too many damn lights, and I'm supposed to sleep on my back? Friggin' impossible. So I try sleeping seriously around eleven and wake up around one. Knowing sleep won't be easy for me, I just chill and watch some King of the Hill, the beginning of an episode I'd watched the end of prior to sleep. I listened to some random SMod while sleeping and laughed at the stories that the gents shared. I woke up every few hours, once to pee, the other times to just try to lay back and get comfortable again. Dr. Reed came in arounf 6:30am and checked the bandages and spoke with me for a minute. I can't remember what he said, but I relaxed and watched a little bit of Wings before trying to sleep again. This time, aroung 7:30 Dr. Noorbakhsh came in, looked at the bandages and told me I'd be able to leave in a few hours.
I just chilled and watched TV alternately between listening to SMod until breakfast. Eating sucked because they hadn't given me any pain killers and my throat hurt from a tube they stuck down it during surgery. Aroung 10 they gave me some nampersin and after than the pain deminished. Dad and Pattie got to the hospital around 10:30 and I was back in the apartment by about noon. We dropped off the 'scrip and continued back to Powhatan where I told the guys of my inability to sleep. We chatted and Miguel and Dorien hung out with me when Dad and Pattie left to pick up the meds. I ate some lasagna slowly, as my throat still hurt, and didn't move much for about an hour. The guys left aroung 1, Dad and Pattie aoung 1:30 then I was alone and watched a coupl-a flicks.
Elizabeth came over around 4 and we chatted until 6, at which time I tok more drugs and watched more movies. Around nine something the Midget-bitch came back and that irritated me. I went to bed around 11 and slept awkwardly. Aroung 4:30 I woke up needing to pee, but was so afraid of tearing out my sutures that I waited too long and peed on my leg which was distressing and I was tired. It was a lot of pee, and I was more worried about blood because at an earlier time when I'd gone to the bathroom one of my healing wounds kept bleeding, just slowly dripping blood. I didn't want to see more blood falling from me so I stalled. Eventually I peed and one of the giand bandage pads I was given fell into the toilet, so I had to get that before flushing the toilet. I ended up making a sign to tell the Midget-bitch not to use the bathroom until I could clean the floor because I was in no state to clean that damn floor at no 5 in the morning.
I took some more drugs and went back to bed. I woke around 11 and ate more lasagna and took some more pain killers and sat high on the couch for at least 3 hours. I had no concept of time. Pretty awesome though. Watched more movies and tried typing which was idiotic because what I wrote made no sense. Still pretty fun. It was a pleasant lazy day I was typing description for dA, so I uploaded a few inked pictures and sketches that I want to color and just chilled. That evening I finally gave my stitches a good look and they didn't look as bad as I was thinking. They weren't really painful either, but I was also riding some painkiler or another so I couldn't feel pain, even if I wanted to.
I didn't do much and went to bed. Sunday, today, I woke up and made myself breakfast. Eggs, bacon and toast before sitting on the couch and watching Zack and Miri Make a Porno. Still amused by this movie. It's also been interesitng to see Kevin Smith's writing evolve, and his accpetance of ad-libbing. Back during Clerks, they stuck to the script, and now during Z&M they were riffing and it made it in. Maybe part of that, but I didn't notice his conversations coming out as much. Mallrats had some serious Clerks style conversations going on, but none of the rest of the Jersey Triliogy[even if there are 6 and not 3] seemed to have that going, not even ClerksII. I missed his clever writing, but I could appreciate it during Jersey Girl, which I don't understand why people didn't like it. I could see it being difficult to market, but it's a good movie in it's own right. I don't regret buying any of these movies and they've been an awesome way to relax for the weekend as I've been resting after my surgery.
I finished Z&M and watched the Making Of doc, and some of the features before decided I ought to read my english stuff, but opting to write a bit instead. Nothing hard hitting, just my life and what not.
I'm now going to take a nap, and I'll take care of things later. English and psych, and I jsut realized that I forgot to interview my brother's for my psych homework, I'll ask them it over the phone or something. I dunno. It's not due until Friday, so I have some time to take care of it. Rest first, work later. :)
Jasmine P.
March 4, 2009
Another Day, Another Rant
I'm not trying with a much mroe conscious effort to maintain this for the time being considering i can't really draw. So from one passive-aggressive activity to another. But I'm also not really angry or at any real emotion outcropping, but I don't really care for most of what I draw. At the moment, if I'm not trying, it comes out awesomely
Anywho, I'm starting this off listening to Sway. This song is so totally my favorite song right now, it's just so pleasant and so much fun to sing to. It's the right type of moving that can cheer me up or calm me down. I just read an article about happiness and different myths, and something the author was talking about was people dealing with upset feelings and getting their happy back. I've know for a long time that music has one of the greatest effects for me. When I'm angry I listen to the power of a song, ignoring the lyrics. When I'm calmer and at peace I listen to something more placid and fluid. When I'm energetic it's something pumped, and then there are all the lines inbetween. Classical, techno, rock, rap, R&B, they each have their moments with me and for my emotions. I'm glad I figured out early on, on one way to harnes my emotions, to express them, then to get back in control of them. If I listen to Rammstein too much in a short period of time I know something's wrong. Most everything else is cool. Coheed and Cambria i'm a little upset, a little off, but mostly I'm fine. The Willing Well IV by C&C just started. They have a very measured tone for some of their songs which works depending on what I need. But I wasn't rally going to talk about that for too long, I was going to review the past few days. Why? Why the fuck not?
Hmm, we had Monday classes cancelled because of a little show and ice. I spent my day on the couch once I rolled out of bed and watched some B:TAS which was alright. The season 4 art really doesn't work out as well for the characters. Scarecrow makes more sense being a skinny fuck, and why the hell is Poison Ivy grey skinned now? I still like the episodes, and I'm fine with with Tim Drake, Dick Grayson was getting to be an annoying ass anyway. But his Nightwing design is poo.
Man, this is the least focused I've been for writing in a while. Heh, non since a Psych assignment from a few weeks back. That took too fucking long D8
Well, I've left the 'Batfamily Reunion' wallpaper behind and have moved onto the 3PS one I have of Risu. I like the simplicity of it. Seirously.
Hmm, apparently my life has been so boring for the past few days that I can't even maintain my attention span to write about it. I'll talk about food for a wee bit, and twitter before I go and pop some more tramadol and the sleep aid from tylenol pm and go to bed 2 hours earlier than I normally do.
Yesterday and on monday I made my own little bit of 'i'm playin' with mah food' awesome. I just sauteed some hot dogs with onions, green pepper, garlic and frozen peas and carrots. I ate that mess with rice, and it was good. It seriously was pretty dan enjoyable, which was awesome. I needed something simple to eat and it worked.
Ooh, on friday I fried some chicken thighs I had. They were forzen so after the very slow process of defrosting them in the pan I was going to fry them in, I cut them into smaller pieces once they were defrosted enough and seasoned it up and fried that shits. It was delicious. I ate that with some tortalinni I hadand a homemade tomato sauce that I'm not eating as a chip dip. Go ingenunity, and not wanting to throw away my little bit of food more often than I already do =D
Tonight's awesome dinner was a simple chicken soup I made. I defrosted three chicken legs I seasoned back in October and boiled them in water that was very simply seasoned. It was also a very small pot so there wasn't much room, but the chicken came out hella tender, which was freakin' sweet. I wish I had put something sweet into it though, maybe next time I'll drain a can of corn and toss that in, I'll also be working in a larger pot. I poured that into a bowl with some rice and it made for a small, but good enough dinner. I'm a little hungry 3 hours later, but it was a very low calorie dinner I guess. I'll be fine, and I can always lose a few pounds.
Speaking of weight loss, I looked at my face yesterday, and it seemed to be a bit skinner than I reemberd it being. Not as svelt and skinny as it was in Septeber post hospital stay, but a bit mroe slender than normal. My diet is the same, and I'm still not really exercsing, but oh well.
I've been a lto more comfortable since that boil on my ass popped the other day. TMI, I know, but don't read this if you don't want ot read about thigns like that. but seriously, walking and sitting and pretty much everything I need to do is much easier since I don't have a large pustule crushing my nerves every two seconds with every movement. God. I'm still limping, but that's from the abscess on my thigh. Yeah, right in the useful connective skin. It sucks.
Maybe I'll be able to get my disgusting bioligical shit off of here before someone important reads this...probably not...too late.
Before Twitter, the SMod Cast. That's Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier's podcast. I seriously spent pretty much all day today listening to most of the first 6. I say most of because my internet is built on fail and only downloaded half of some of the casts, soI had to re-download them. But they did make for quite entertianing listenings while I walked from one class to another. Yeah, freakin' amusing and awesome. So, my stupid fangirlisms aside, I will say this, I still think Mosier is adorable, married or not. And both he and Kevin Smith are pretty amusing to listen to. And by 'both' I mean' Smith' because Mosier doesn't talk half as much as Smith does, but without Mosier, it wouldn't half as much fun. Sometimes I take too much pleasure from calling people by their last names.
On to Twitter. This site it still ten types of useful. I follow celeb junk, why not. And a few strangers. But I find it odd when people follow me. Like one dude who couldn't spell 'Betelgeuise' correctly followed me because I said I was renting the movie. And someone else, who I vaguely wonder is my 12th grade english teacher, is now following my on Twitter. But it would be impossible to find me because I didn't start using this handle until late 2007, early 2008, and it would be a work out for her to find me from other sites. Yeah, some link right to it, but I think it's a random person. She wanted to know the receipe for my chicken soup, because I said it was killer, but I was just enjoying it. I consider most of my non-receipes to be friggin' killer, so... yeah. But I still enjoy my twitter and am happy that award season is over because just during the Oscars I got hundreds of updates from the film groups I watch. I kind of with Miramax wouldn't post the same tweet over and over, over the course of the day, but what can I do, I mean really. I'm fine with following them.
And I think I'm all personal reviewed out and will be going to bed soon...now ish.
Peace out internet. Have a good one, and I'll be back bright and early in the morning. :)
Jasmine P.
Anywho, I'm starting this off listening to Sway. This song is so totally my favorite song right now, it's just so pleasant and so much fun to sing to. It's the right type of moving that can cheer me up or calm me down. I just read an article about happiness and different myths, and something the author was talking about was people dealing with upset feelings and getting their happy back. I've know for a long time that music has one of the greatest effects for me. When I'm angry I listen to the power of a song, ignoring the lyrics. When I'm calmer and at peace I listen to something more placid and fluid. When I'm energetic it's something pumped, and then there are all the lines inbetween. Classical, techno, rock, rap, R&B, they each have their moments with me and for my emotions. I'm glad I figured out early on, on one way to harnes my emotions, to express them, then to get back in control of them. If I listen to Rammstein too much in a short period of time I know something's wrong. Most everything else is cool. Coheed and Cambria i'm a little upset, a little off, but mostly I'm fine. The Willing Well IV by C&C just started. They have a very measured tone for some of their songs which works depending on what I need. But I wasn't rally going to talk about that for too long, I was going to review the past few days. Why? Why the fuck not?
Hmm, we had Monday classes cancelled because of a little show and ice. I spent my day on the couch once I rolled out of bed and watched some B:TAS which was alright. The season 4 art really doesn't work out as well for the characters. Scarecrow makes more sense being a skinny fuck, and why the hell is Poison Ivy grey skinned now? I still like the episodes, and I'm fine with with Tim Drake, Dick Grayson was getting to be an annoying ass anyway. But his Nightwing design is poo.
Man, this is the least focused I've been for writing in a while. Heh, non since a Psych assignment from a few weeks back. That took too fucking long D8
Well, I've left the 'Batfamily Reunion' wallpaper behind and have moved onto the 3PS one I have of Risu. I like the simplicity of it. Seirously.
Hmm, apparently my life has been so boring for the past few days that I can't even maintain my attention span to write about it. I'll talk about food for a wee bit, and twitter before I go and pop some more tramadol and the sleep aid from tylenol pm and go to bed 2 hours earlier than I normally do.
Yesterday and on monday I made my own little bit of 'i'm playin' with mah food' awesome. I just sauteed some hot dogs with onions, green pepper, garlic and frozen peas and carrots. I ate that mess with rice, and it was good. It seriously was pretty dan enjoyable, which was awesome. I needed something simple to eat and it worked.
Ooh, on friday I fried some chicken thighs I had. They were forzen so after the very slow process of defrosting them in the pan I was going to fry them in, I cut them into smaller pieces once they were defrosted enough and seasoned it up and fried that shits. It was delicious. I ate that with some tortalinni I hadand a homemade tomato sauce that I'm not eating as a chip dip. Go ingenunity, and not wanting to throw away my little bit of food more often than I already do =D
Tonight's awesome dinner was a simple chicken soup I made. I defrosted three chicken legs I seasoned back in October and boiled them in water that was very simply seasoned. It was also a very small pot so there wasn't much room, but the chicken came out hella tender, which was freakin' sweet. I wish I had put something sweet into it though, maybe next time I'll drain a can of corn and toss that in, I'll also be working in a larger pot. I poured that into a bowl with some rice and it made for a small, but good enough dinner. I'm a little hungry 3 hours later, but it was a very low calorie dinner I guess. I'll be fine, and I can always lose a few pounds.
Speaking of weight loss, I looked at my face yesterday, and it seemed to be a bit skinner than I reemberd it being. Not as svelt and skinny as it was in Septeber post hospital stay, but a bit mroe slender than normal. My diet is the same, and I'm still not really exercsing, but oh well.
I've been a lto more comfortable since that boil on my ass popped the other day. TMI, I know, but don't read this if you don't want ot read about thigns like that. but seriously, walking and sitting and pretty much everything I need to do is much easier since I don't have a large pustule crushing my nerves every two seconds with every movement. God. I'm still limping, but that's from the abscess on my thigh. Yeah, right in the useful connective skin. It sucks.
Maybe I'll be able to get my disgusting bioligical shit off of here before someone important reads this...probably not...too late.
Before Twitter, the SMod Cast. That's Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier's podcast. I seriously spent pretty much all day today listening to most of the first 6. I say most of because my internet is built on fail and only downloaded half of some of the casts, soI had to re-download them. But they did make for quite entertianing listenings while I walked from one class to another. Yeah, freakin' amusing and awesome. So, my stupid fangirlisms aside, I will say this, I still think Mosier is adorable, married or not. And both he and Kevin Smith are pretty amusing to listen to. And by 'both' I mean' Smith' because Mosier doesn't talk half as much as Smith does, but without Mosier, it wouldn't half as much fun. Sometimes I take too much pleasure from calling people by their last names.
On to Twitter. This site it still ten types of useful. I follow celeb junk, why not. And a few strangers. But I find it odd when people follow me. Like one dude who couldn't spell 'Betelgeuise' correctly followed me because I said I was renting the movie. And someone else, who I vaguely wonder is my 12th grade english teacher, is now following my on Twitter. But it would be impossible to find me because I didn't start using this handle until late 2007, early 2008, and it would be a work out for her to find me from other sites. Yeah, some link right to it, but I think it's a random person. She wanted to know the receipe for my chicken soup, because I said it was killer, but I was just enjoying it. I consider most of my non-receipes to be friggin' killer, so... yeah. But I still enjoy my twitter and am happy that award season is over because just during the Oscars I got hundreds of updates from the film groups I watch. I kind of with Miramax wouldn't post the same tweet over and over, over the course of the day, but what can I do, I mean really. I'm fine with following them.
And I think I'm all personal reviewed out and will be going to bed soon...now ish.
Peace out internet. Have a good one, and I'll be back bright and early in the morning. :)
Jasmine P.
March 1, 2009
A Continuation
Now, to continue with my not quite sordid affairs that have lasted me the past two months, we are now in February and I remember the past month with much more clarity than the prior, because it has been two goddamn months since January. Also, January was so long because it was packed with non-sequitors that came to mind and extra details. But onto the rest of Feruary.
On the 15th we went out to UVA for a tournament and I drank so much goddam coffee that my addiction as seriously be re-ignited in a painful way. Seriously, I drank 2 double shots before 8, and a edius Dunkin' Doughnuts coffee so I could be alert enough for the drive. I learned that Glenn is crap at maintaining a speed. He says this is the furthurest he's driven him 'new' stick shift, which I can accept, he also blames his cruise control for not working properly and I don't accept that because I can maintain my speed better, as far as I'm concerned, and I haveno cruise control. It's all in my foot, baby.
Oh yeah, the previous day, Valentines day, after sobering up enouhg for it to be safe for me to drive from Ian's place, I head over to the Walmart on Little Creek to buy some gatorade and thigns because I don't know what UVA's going to have, and it was a good idea. The gatorade was quite welomed as was the water, so I think I'll keep that up next semester, buying a case of water and a few gatorades for the fencers.
Za made some awesome cookies. Just pointing that out. They were delicious.
Hmm, I glossed over the torunie yesterday, it was a tournie the stats were put down quick style, so let's move back to me. That was Sunday, I was too tired upon returning to Norfolk to do my English reading, but ehh, I tink I had a writing and didn't do it it. Sleep prevailed. Hel, I was tired all day Monday from making the drive and not sleeping properly the weekend before. Hmm, On the Tuesday I went into the EVMS for a surgical consultation for my skin bacteria of terrible and pain and annoying and now itch. Fuck the healing, I'm tired fo the itchiness. But I go in there and after Dr. Britt sees them we figure outwhen I'll be getting them taken care of, the Thursday of my Spring Break, the 12th or something. I think it's the thirteenth.
After about an hour long conversation with my grandmother...
I spent the rest of that tuesday and that week to tell the truth trying to placate my family and tell them what was going on. That was tedious. Seriously tedious. I had to alay theri fears, but noe my father, Patti and my brothers are coming for about two days to hang with me and I dunno, to show they care. My brothers Ihave no problem with. But my father a few more issues because it's not like he's tried to maintan contact with me. I mean, yeah, I do call my brothers about once a week or so, so it's not that often, but we can still maintain a conversation. I never rally want to tell my father anything so I avoid telling him too many truths. He knows I'm goinginto surgery because you tell people that. And he's paying my insurance bills, he kind of really should know. I don't really want them to be here, but they're coming, so I guess I can deal.
Ehh, I've decided that augmentin is a bitch of a anti-bacterial. They gave it to me and now these things bleed, but they don't hurt all the time like before. They're just bloody and gross more often. Man, I'm sleepy now, but I have things to do and things I want to do, like see if I can find a new comic or two, but back to the past. That was that week.
I was bored and alone on Friday. I had been fine up until Friday to be on my own for the weekend, but once Friday ngiht hit I had a mean wave of lonely going on, so I went on an adventure down 64, heading east. That eventually took me to route 17, so I went south and all the way to Elizabeth City. I never didn't anything there, but that's because it was ten, it was dark and nothing was really open. Bumble-fuck towns suck like that. Back in Reston I could drive around and find something, almost anything would have been viable in NoVA, but not here. Yeah. I burned through half a tank of gas doing that too. Thankfully I havne't needed any more glas since then though, or else it would have been that much more annoying.
Saturday I don't remember what I did, but Saturday evening I hung out with Nicole. Incase of anything in the fture, Nicole is a new member to the odufc and she's pretty chill. Anywho, she made a homemade hot pocket, that's something I think I'll try, but I'll need a different type of binding agent, not cream cheese. I might try some type of gravy that's thickened with cracker crumbs or bread. I don't know yet.
This past week was fine, nothing spectacular. This past weekend I watched Clerks and have fallen in love. Ever since I saw Zack and Miri I read a book about Kevin Smith, well, it was a series of journals he had written back around 2003 before filming Jay and Silentbob Strike Back. I found the whole thing to be interesting and Smith has an interesting and unique writing style. I fell in love with Clerks for the reasons it got picked up. There's no real story, but it is a series of interactions. Some are inspired by things that have really happened, some are just some fucked up things he made up. It's a smooth combination of the two that make it awesome to watch. These conversations remind me of my favorite interactions with people, most notably, my interactions with Alex. Dant and Randal have a rapport that reminds me of me and Alex chatting about everything and nothing. And at the same time, everything is important, even if we're just talking about some movie or something stupid. Their conversations were what people did.
My opinion on why the movie is so well loved is that it is one of the most realistic looks at a normal 2o something. They're just stumbling around life and chatting about whatis important at that age. There's no easy way to lay the movie out, but I was caught my Smith's writing during Z&M which is why I needed to see this and for the next few months I'll be watching his other movies. I'll continue through the View Askew Universe to see what I can gleam from everything else. It's jsut a really unique writing style so it's also easy to see why he doesn't like ad-libbing, even thought ad-libbing is one of my favorite things.
I seriously can't put it all into words, this is easily something I'll be able to come back to some time in the future, what I think about this movie. But it's on my list. Something I will own as a DVD, and whatever entity of personal film ownership there will be in the future. It's something I will love when I'm 50, and I'll show it to my kids. Why, it just says something that most anyone at the age of 20-ish can get. Everyone will take away something different, but still important to know or understand about themselves and their friends.
From the extras there were comments about Randal's sexuality, but like they said it's a friend thing. People you're reall ygood friends with you become very protective of them. I'm highly protective of all of my friends, and I'm serious about it all. I would do most anything for any of my really good friends. That's how I am, that's how I pictured Randal. There's another character...Shawn and Gus from PSych have that type of relationship. They're best friends, and they're the only ones who can properly set the other straight, though in the movie Randal set Dante straight more often than not. It would seem like Dante would be in that position, but it works that it's Randal who does that. It's interesting to see the person who seems to be less serious and in control of things to be the much more centered person. The free spirit leads better sometimes and that day, that was the truth.
---
Well, not much more than a nut shell, that was the past two months for me. This journal and the previous one. I've needed to write and haven't had a good topic until now. A large part of it has been Clerks it made me want to write a script. I may start it. I may now, possibly. That's something I have to think about, but at the moment, it is something I'd like to do. But writing this out will also be good for the future when I don't remember my college experiences. Things like this will put some things back into perspective. I'll write more, probably. I might need to just write out something every evening since I have such a writing bug. I guess simply writing out my day will suffice. So maybe for a time this will just be a real journal and not a random collection of essays, but I do love the essays. They're me at my most me. Me at my most me. I'm at ease. I think the rain plus the movies and finally writing has set me to an easy. It's been so cathartic, I miss writing like this. I'll make the time for it since I can't draw worth shit right now, I might as well spend my time writing again.
Well, peace, love and applesauce. I'm not going to sleep, but I'm signing out for now. so PL&A and I'm rocked out, bitches.
Jasmine P.
On the 15th we went out to UVA for a tournament and I drank so much goddam coffee that my addiction as seriously be re-ignited in a painful way. Seriously, I drank 2 double shots before 8, and a edius Dunkin' Doughnuts coffee so I could be alert enough for the drive. I learned that Glenn is crap at maintaining a speed. He says this is the furthurest he's driven him 'new' stick shift, which I can accept, he also blames his cruise control for not working properly and I don't accept that because I can maintain my speed better, as far as I'm concerned, and I haveno cruise control. It's all in my foot, baby.
Oh yeah, the previous day, Valentines day, after sobering up enouhg for it to be safe for me to drive from Ian's place, I head over to the Walmart on Little Creek to buy some gatorade and thigns because I don't know what UVA's going to have, and it was a good idea. The gatorade was quite welomed as was the water, so I think I'll keep that up next semester, buying a case of water and a few gatorades for the fencers.
Za made some awesome cookies. Just pointing that out. They were delicious.
Hmm, I glossed over the torunie yesterday, it was a tournie the stats were put down quick style, so let's move back to me. That was Sunday, I was too tired upon returning to Norfolk to do my English reading, but ehh, I tink I had a writing and didn't do it it. Sleep prevailed. Hel, I was tired all day Monday from making the drive and not sleeping properly the weekend before. Hmm, On the Tuesday I went into the EVMS for a surgical consultation for my skin bacteria of terrible and pain and annoying and now itch. Fuck the healing, I'm tired fo the itchiness. But I go in there and after Dr. Britt sees them we figure outwhen I'll be getting them taken care of, the Thursday of my Spring Break, the 12th or something. I think it's the thirteenth.
After about an hour long conversation with my grandmother...
I spent the rest of that tuesday and that week to tell the truth trying to placate my family and tell them what was going on. That was tedious. Seriously tedious. I had to alay theri fears, but noe my father, Patti and my brothers are coming for about two days to hang with me and I dunno, to show they care. My brothers Ihave no problem with. But my father a few more issues because it's not like he's tried to maintan contact with me. I mean, yeah, I do call my brothers about once a week or so, so it's not that often, but we can still maintain a conversation. I never rally want to tell my father anything so I avoid telling him too many truths. He knows I'm goinginto surgery because you tell people that. And he's paying my insurance bills, he kind of really should know. I don't really want them to be here, but they're coming, so I guess I can deal.
Ehh, I've decided that augmentin is a bitch of a anti-bacterial. They gave it to me and now these things bleed, but they don't hurt all the time like before. They're just bloody and gross more often. Man, I'm sleepy now, but I have things to do and things I want to do, like see if I can find a new comic or two, but back to the past. That was that week.
I was bored and alone on Friday. I had been fine up until Friday to be on my own for the weekend, but once Friday ngiht hit I had a mean wave of lonely going on, so I went on an adventure down 64, heading east. That eventually took me to route 17, so I went south and all the way to Elizabeth City. I never didn't anything there, but that's because it was ten, it was dark and nothing was really open. Bumble-fuck towns suck like that. Back in Reston I could drive around and find something, almost anything would have been viable in NoVA, but not here. Yeah. I burned through half a tank of gas doing that too. Thankfully I havne't needed any more glas since then though, or else it would have been that much more annoying.
Saturday I don't remember what I did, but Saturday evening I hung out with Nicole. Incase of anything in the fture, Nicole is a new member to the odufc and she's pretty chill. Anywho, she made a homemade hot pocket, that's something I think I'll try, but I'll need a different type of binding agent, not cream cheese. I might try some type of gravy that's thickened with cracker crumbs or bread. I don't know yet.
This past week was fine, nothing spectacular. This past weekend I watched Clerks and have fallen in love. Ever since I saw Zack and Miri I read a book about Kevin Smith, well, it was a series of journals he had written back around 2003 before filming Jay and Silentbob Strike Back. I found the whole thing to be interesting and Smith has an interesting and unique writing style. I fell in love with Clerks for the reasons it got picked up. There's no real story, but it is a series of interactions. Some are inspired by things that have really happened, some are just some fucked up things he made up. It's a smooth combination of the two that make it awesome to watch. These conversations remind me of my favorite interactions with people, most notably, my interactions with Alex. Dant and Randal have a rapport that reminds me of me and Alex chatting about everything and nothing. And at the same time, everything is important, even if we're just talking about some movie or something stupid. Their conversations were what people did.
My opinion on why the movie is so well loved is that it is one of the most realistic looks at a normal 2o something. They're just stumbling around life and chatting about whatis important at that age. There's no easy way to lay the movie out, but I was caught my Smith's writing during Z&M which is why I needed to see this and for the next few months I'll be watching his other movies. I'll continue through the View Askew Universe to see what I can gleam from everything else. It's jsut a really unique writing style so it's also easy to see why he doesn't like ad-libbing, even thought ad-libbing is one of my favorite things.
I seriously can't put it all into words, this is easily something I'll be able to come back to some time in the future, what I think about this movie. But it's on my list. Something I will own as a DVD, and whatever entity of personal film ownership there will be in the future. It's something I will love when I'm 50, and I'll show it to my kids. Why, it just says something that most anyone at the age of 20-ish can get. Everyone will take away something different, but still important to know or understand about themselves and their friends.
From the extras there were comments about Randal's sexuality, but like they said it's a friend thing. People you're reall ygood friends with you become very protective of them. I'm highly protective of all of my friends, and I'm serious about it all. I would do most anything for any of my really good friends. That's how I am, that's how I pictured Randal. There's another character...Shawn and Gus from PSych have that type of relationship. They're best friends, and they're the only ones who can properly set the other straight, though in the movie Randal set Dante straight more often than not. It would seem like Dante would be in that position, but it works that it's Randal who does that. It's interesting to see the person who seems to be less serious and in control of things to be the much more centered person. The free spirit leads better sometimes and that day, that was the truth.
---
Well, not much more than a nut shell, that was the past two months for me. This journal and the previous one. I've needed to write and haven't had a good topic until now. A large part of it has been Clerks it made me want to write a script. I may start it. I may now, possibly. That's something I have to think about, but at the moment, it is something I'd like to do. But writing this out will also be good for the future when I don't remember my college experiences. Things like this will put some things back into perspective. I'll write more, probably. I might need to just write out something every evening since I have such a writing bug. I guess simply writing out my day will suffice. So maybe for a time this will just be a real journal and not a random collection of essays, but I do love the essays. They're me at my most me. Me at my most me. I'm at ease. I think the rain plus the movies and finally writing has set me to an easy. It's been so cathartic, I miss writing like this. I'll make the time for it since I can't draw worth shit right now, I might as well spend my time writing again.
Well, peace, love and applesauce. I'm not going to sleep, but I'm signing out for now. so PL&A and I'm rocked out, bitches.
Jasmine P.
February 28, 2009
Mr. Smith
Kevin Smith,
It is apparently imperative that I write a letter you will most likely never see. If I in fact leave my waning sanity and send it to you, this line would be kept in because that's how I roll.
To being, let's put something in perspective, you graduated high school the year I was born.
Now that that's out of the way, to the meat and potatoes of this little little bit of verbose lovefest. I seriously loved Clerks. The second time I tried to watch it. Funny thin is it's been about two months since the first time I tried to watch it, but something wasn't right with me. I loved the cartoon and had to see where it all stemmed from, and finally after readng Silent Bob Speaks and after watching Robert Rodriguez's first couple of movies I had a better appreciation for 1) modern black and white film and 2) something as box destroying as Clerks.
I have spent the past month of January loving El Mariachi, Desperados, From Dusk Till dawn, Four Rooms and The Faculty and I read his book Rebel Without A Crew which put a whole new perspective in my mind about smaller budgeted films that legally there was no way I was seeing when they came out.
What I have decided I have to say to you is that I have spent my entire evening watching Clerks, about 4 times, and most of the special features from the Tenth anniversary collection that I rented from an independent movie rental place near my college campus. I loved the writing. I loved seeing words that most people don't see much too much further than outside of an English class room or in a dictionary when they're looking for dirty words. The rifts between the characters were hella realistic. That's not near how I talk with my friends, but we can and have gotten into conversations, deep conversations on such a variety of topics that how serious they were when they were talking about the most trite of subjects was one of the things that made it special.
Every group of friends has their topic[s]. It was an interesting peek inside your world, well, the world you lived in when you were about my age [you old fuck :)]and it is always nice to see that the youth of the world do have the love of a good conversation or debate, no matter what age they are. Here, it's that awkward stage between being an adult and being a child. I mean, in my eyes right now, I don't usually think of myself as an adult, and I don't can, truly call myself a child.
What this movie has done was inspire me to take my writing mroe seriously. I don't really want to write for a movie, but like many non-famous people I am interested in meeting some celebs. I'm much more interested in getting my own comic drawn and published, or to become a world reknown botanist. Those are things that make me happy. Comics and plants. What was the point of that, note sure, these things are mostly rants to tell the truth.
I loved Clerks and when I have the chance I'm renting the rest of the flicks from the Askewniverse. It seems to be an interesting place to visit every now and again. I know the rest won't be like Clerks, but I'm sure I'll fall in love with each of them for different reasons.
And another point, I loved Zack and Miri Make a Porno. That was the most interesting romantic comedy I've ever seen. The characters did seem to be the most real and they didn't follow the stereotypic relationship arc as in most romantic comedys. And the set up that they've known eachother for just about the entireity of their lives and they live together is a great set up for why they never slept together themselves. I loved what you did with the characters, everybody. Everything fit into the rules of the world. Every movie world has it's own set of rules, and the rules for Z&M were engaging and awesome.
Jasmine P.
It is apparently imperative that I write a letter you will most likely never see. If I in fact leave my waning sanity and send it to you, this line would be kept in because that's how I roll.
To being, let's put something in perspective, you graduated high school the year I was born.
Now that that's out of the way, to the meat and potatoes of this little little bit of verbose lovefest. I seriously loved Clerks. The second time I tried to watch it. Funny thin is it's been about two months since the first time I tried to watch it, but something wasn't right with me. I loved the cartoon and had to see where it all stemmed from, and finally after readng Silent Bob Speaks and after watching Robert Rodriguez's first couple of movies I had a better appreciation for 1) modern black and white film and 2) something as box destroying as Clerks.
I have spent the past month of January loving El Mariachi, Desperados, From Dusk Till dawn, Four Rooms and The Faculty and I read his book Rebel Without A Crew which put a whole new perspective in my mind about smaller budgeted films that legally there was no way I was seeing when they came out.
What I have decided I have to say to you is that I have spent my entire evening watching Clerks, about 4 times, and most of the special features from the Tenth anniversary collection that I rented from an independent movie rental place near my college campus. I loved the writing. I loved seeing words that most people don't see much too much further than outside of an English class room or in a dictionary when they're looking for dirty words. The rifts between the characters were hella realistic. That's not near how I talk with my friends, but we can and have gotten into conversations, deep conversations on such a variety of topics that how serious they were when they were talking about the most trite of subjects was one of the things that made it special.
Every group of friends has their topic[s]. It was an interesting peek inside your world, well, the world you lived in when you were about my age [you old fuck :)]and it is always nice to see that the youth of the world do have the love of a good conversation or debate, no matter what age they are. Here, it's that awkward stage between being an adult and being a child. I mean, in my eyes right now, I don't usually think of myself as an adult, and I don't can, truly call myself a child.
What this movie has done was inspire me to take my writing mroe seriously. I don't really want to write for a movie, but like many non-famous people I am interested in meeting some celebs. I'm much more interested in getting my own comic drawn and published, or to become a world reknown botanist. Those are things that make me happy. Comics and plants. What was the point of that, note sure, these things are mostly rants to tell the truth.
I loved Clerks and when I have the chance I'm renting the rest of the flicks from the Askewniverse. It seems to be an interesting place to visit every now and again. I know the rest won't be like Clerks, but I'm sure I'll fall in love with each of them for different reasons.
And another point, I loved Zack and Miri Make a Porno. That was the most interesting romantic comedy I've ever seen. The characters did seem to be the most real and they didn't follow the stereotypic relationship arc as in most romantic comedys. And the set up that they've known eachother for just about the entireity of their lives and they live together is a great set up for why they never slept together themselves. I loved what you did with the characters, everybody. Everything fit into the rules of the world. Every movie world has it's own set of rules, and the rules for Z&M were engaging and awesome.
Jasmine P.
February 16, 2009
Talent
I'm rubbing my back here for this, but my writing has time after time amazing and surprised me with just how well written things may be, or just how I say things.
The first time I noticed this was when I was proving some point for another and referenced my Flintstone Syndrome journal that I wrote last June or July. I was seriously stopped in my tracks when I read it. The writing surprised me because it was written at a level different from where I was. I mean, I know I'm a good writer, but I never re-read my work aside from a quick skim for major typos or grammatical brouhaha, but I never notice anything like this. I actually had to finish the journal just because I liked what I'd written so much.
I've been thinking about this for about a week off and on, and today I had another of those moments. It was one of those memes that's like '15 things about you' and i said "Death is the ultimate spoiler. Tell me how I'll die and I'll tell you how I'll live"
That just seemed like a poignant message. It was something written in the blink of an eye before, but now, it seems to have that much more weight to it. I don't know how, but I think it's an interesting display of my strength that I don't always feel. Seeing it so blatantly in front of my eyes, it's no wonder that I scare people. Now I seriously need to find someone who can compete with that strength. Match it as a perfect foil, keep it in check.
I dunno. I'm a mite distracted, and I got most of my point here. But this brings up another point of my journals. Some of them are incredibly unfullfilling because I end them when I lose focus. It's like running into a brick wall. But I also know that when I can't focus on them properly, the over all tone changes and then they become both a drag to read and a drag to write.
Anywho, I'll be back here...some other time. I finally have things to write, like about yesterday's tournament, but not now. I should start my paper before the night is over.
Jasmine P.
The first time I noticed this was when I was proving some point for another and referenced my Flintstone Syndrome journal that I wrote last June or July. I was seriously stopped in my tracks when I read it. The writing surprised me because it was written at a level different from where I was. I mean, I know I'm a good writer, but I never re-read my work aside from a quick skim for major typos or grammatical brouhaha, but I never notice anything like this. I actually had to finish the journal just because I liked what I'd written so much.
I've been thinking about this for about a week off and on, and today I had another of those moments. It was one of those memes that's like '15 things about you' and i said "Death is the ultimate spoiler. Tell me how I'll die and I'll tell you how I'll live"
That just seemed like a poignant message. It was something written in the blink of an eye before, but now, it seems to have that much more weight to it. I don't know how, but I think it's an interesting display of my strength that I don't always feel. Seeing it so blatantly in front of my eyes, it's no wonder that I scare people. Now I seriously need to find someone who can compete with that strength. Match it as a perfect foil, keep it in check.
I dunno. I'm a mite distracted, and I got most of my point here. But this brings up another point of my journals. Some of them are incredibly unfullfilling because I end them when I lose focus. It's like running into a brick wall. But I also know that when I can't focus on them properly, the over all tone changes and then they become both a drag to read and a drag to write.
Anywho, I'll be back here...some other time. I finally have things to write, like about yesterday's tournament, but not now. I should start my paper before the night is over.
Jasmine P.
December 15, 2008
Do Unto Others As You Would Want Them To Do Unto You
I haven't properly written anything out in a while, more than a month really. Well, I think there's one or two things on LJ or Facebook but ehh, those two journals don't get the same treatment as over here does. Twitter gets the truth most often, the deepest parts of my soul in only 160 characters. Well, 140, but 160 in a text, but that's neither here nor there.
I've figured out and decided that I'm at a major cross roads in my life and I've been here for a while. How long I cann0t tell but things are different. some times I'm a lot happier than I've been in a while, other times I'm somewhat listless and my attention span has been nowhere serious for the past few days. I think it's partially a very mild depression but I'm still moving away from where i used to be. i mean, this time last year I was crazed and ready to get the hell out of dodge. And I think a very little mite suicidal. I assume I'm true about that last assumption. i don't like that thought one little bit, but it might be a small part of my truth about life.
Considering I've spent so much time alone I've had a lot to think about without other people getting in the way. Apparently Firefox can't spell check anymore. fucking whore. blargle ggj ...joy. Back to the point, my technological assistance is apparently temporarily out, maybe because this window's been open for a while, and now I just plain have an internet error, joy.
Back to my life. Now, there are two guys who are apparently vying for attention in my mind. One of them works at Borjo and I know I won't say a damned thing to him, and i think he's in a relationship anyway. Okay, this is annoying. Time to refresh the fucking window. There, it's fixed, but back to the point, once more. The other guy I've never said a word to, but he does intrigue me and I do want to say something. Mostly tell him his hat is bitching, but even that apparently sends me a twitter and makes me confused and like an annoying girl. Interacting wiht strangers is quite annoying and American society does not make it any easier. Great, it's crapped out once more. Fuck you ODU internet. Yeah, I wish this were more of a spur of the moment thing and not something I've been thinking about saying all semester. I'm a weird one. Chance are I'll say this, then it'll be another person on my 'hi-bye' roster of acquaintances. No big deal.
On to more stupidity that's been running through my head. I am currently obsessing of the TV show Psych. I think a rabid obsession has been missing from my life. I haven't really been focused on anything for a while and even with my faulty attention span from the past few days, I have been enjoying the show and the commentary and have tried to draw James Roday and Dule Hill. James is much more of a challenge, and he is now on my list of actors it would be bitching to meet. Well included in this list is the even awesome RDJ, Johnny Depp, and Morgan Freeman to remind myself of a few of the celebs I would love to meet. Hell, I would love to film an episode of Psych. 'Guest starring a random fan!' Bomb diggity.
I don't know where I'm going right now and I think that's why I had to spend some time alone, so I could get a proper handle on myself and what I need. I don't know how to fix me and getting a boyfriend is a bit of a pipe dream still. Pipe dream territory is never fun.
Now's not the time for my to do my big 'it's the end of the year' thing. I kind of did that for my birthday when I said 'i'm not dead yet' but maybe this time I'll wait until January and just have my big 'changing of the year' thing ring in the next year instead of shutting down the old one. God, this new mp3 player recharges is no time. From no batter to almost full in about 45min. Gold.
I'm sure this has accomplished something important to me, but I'm not sure of what it is quite yet. The point is to be theraputic and I'm not sure how useful this one was. Probably more than I realize at this moment, but it's not as useful as my last conversation with Alex. But nothingis near as useful as any of those, except for face-to-face interaction.
Jasmine P.
I've figured out and decided that I'm at a major cross roads in my life and I've been here for a while. How long I cann0t tell but things are different. some times I'm a lot happier than I've been in a while, other times I'm somewhat listless and my attention span has been nowhere serious for the past few days. I think it's partially a very mild depression but I'm still moving away from where i used to be. i mean, this time last year I was crazed and ready to get the hell out of dodge. And I think a very little mite suicidal. I assume I'm true about that last assumption. i don't like that thought one little bit, but it might be a small part of my truth about life.
Considering I've spent so much time alone I've had a lot to think about without other people getting in the way. Apparently Firefox can't spell check anymore. fucking whore. blargle ggj ...joy. Back to the point, my technological assistance is apparently temporarily out, maybe because this window's been open for a while, and now I just plain have an internet error, joy.
Back to my life. Now, there are two guys who are apparently vying for attention in my mind. One of them works at Borjo and I know I won't say a damned thing to him, and i think he's in a relationship anyway. Okay, this is annoying. Time to refresh the fucking window. There, it's fixed, but back to the point, once more. The other guy I've never said a word to, but he does intrigue me and I do want to say something. Mostly tell him his hat is bitching, but even that apparently sends me a twitter and makes me confused and like an annoying girl. Interacting wiht strangers is quite annoying and American society does not make it any easier. Great, it's crapped out once more. Fuck you ODU internet. Yeah, I wish this were more of a spur of the moment thing and not something I've been thinking about saying all semester. I'm a weird one. Chance are I'll say this, then it'll be another person on my 'hi-bye' roster of acquaintances. No big deal.
On to more stupidity that's been running through my head. I am currently obsessing of the TV show Psych. I think a rabid obsession has been missing from my life. I haven't really been focused on anything for a while and even with my faulty attention span from the past few days, I have been enjoying the show and the commentary and have tried to draw James Roday and Dule Hill. James is much more of a challenge, and he is now on my list of actors it would be bitching to meet. Well included in this list is the even awesome RDJ, Johnny Depp, and Morgan Freeman to remind myself of a few of the celebs I would love to meet. Hell, I would love to film an episode of Psych. 'Guest starring a random fan!' Bomb diggity.
I don't know where I'm going right now and I think that's why I had to spend some time alone, so I could get a proper handle on myself and what I need. I don't know how to fix me and getting a boyfriend is a bit of a pipe dream still. Pipe dream territory is never fun.
Now's not the time for my to do my big 'it's the end of the year' thing. I kind of did that for my birthday when I said 'i'm not dead yet' but maybe this time I'll wait until January and just have my big 'changing of the year' thing ring in the next year instead of shutting down the old one. God, this new mp3 player recharges is no time. From no batter to almost full in about 45min. Gold.
I'm sure this has accomplished something important to me, but I'm not sure of what it is quite yet. The point is to be theraputic and I'm not sure how useful this one was. Probably more than I realize at this moment, but it's not as useful as my last conversation with Alex. But nothingis near as useful as any of those, except for face-to-face interaction.
Jasmine P.
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