I don't try to find quotes, they happen to be everywhere I am.
~~~~
There's a tacit agreement in the nation today that the white male is the only legitimate target for any and all satire, criticism, and so forth. And we pretty much just accept it. -Jack Nicholson
When I look at a face I am constantly drawn to someone's eyes. Eyes are important. If I'm actually looking at you, chances are I'm looking at your eyes-Me
We're still trying to ascribe predictable patterns to the most wonderfully chaotic fucking fountain droplets ever, which is the individual. -Robert Downey Jr.
I am that guy, but I'm also not the fuckin' story. - Robert Downey Jr.
Contact isn't 'I fuckin' see you in the morning and at night and we talk during the day' That's just fucking proximity. What's the Cosa Nostra element? What do we share that you can't get from anyone else but me? -RDJ
Is this supposed to be a natural conversation, because with cameras, tape recorders and reporters, it's hard to be natural. -Jov Favreau
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 30, 2008
June 27, 2008
Throwback
So, I found one of my notebooks from a few years back with some observational things, and because i never really read what I write, transcribing it could prove interesting, to me, if no one else.
This is written exactly as I' written it years ago. No editing for grammar, structure or punctuation.
I can't finish this...it's too idiotic. I don't even care what my point was then. And I couldn't spell Britain. This is about half of what I had from that night I assume. C'est la vie. I'll have something here later. After sleep.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
This is written exactly as I' written it years ago. No editing for grammar, structure or punctuation.
Thoughts on Languages
May 2, 04
I don't think that there are so many different languages. I think that there is one master 'language' of meaning that represents names and words in out facts of language. If this theory (with no evidence) is true humans, animals, computers and any and everything on earth, in space, this reality and realm all speak the same language, but each has a different understnaidng of it.
One example of this theoryis between present-day-British-English and present-day-Northern-American-English. Take the flat, doughy, usually sweet treat Americans call a 'cookie'; go to England, Great Britian, and the same flat, doughy usually sweet treat and you'll find it may also go by the name 'biscuit' and not 'cookie--
I can't finish this...it's too idiotic. I don't even care what my point was then. And I couldn't spell Britain. This is about half of what I had from that night I assume. C'est la vie. I'll have something here later. After sleep.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 26, 2008
Movies
Okay, since I'm obsessing over KKBB and movies at the moment this is well timed.
Firstly, I love movie commentary. If I buy my camera [and I will, dammit!] whatever movies I make will feature commentary, mine and Za's since she'll probably be in half of what I make, and whoever else wants to comment on my videos.
Commentary is fun, it tells a lot about the behind the scenes of a movie and if there is character/actor commentary and not just director and writer commentary, it's even better. Actor commentary is the most fun because they're usually incredibly vain, or their general reaction to their fellow actor's performances. You learn a lot about the actors themselves and they just enhance the fun of the movie.
One of my other things about movies are how much fun is sounds like the actors have on set. The jokes and such. I guess it's the same general bullshit that happens between me and my friends, but it just sounds like so much fun, and for it to be on video, that's like a second bit of awesome and amazing because all that shit you say off the top of your head, you can hear it again later and it just plain sounds like fun.
Over on facebook my status says/said I wanted a youthifier. Actually, I want the Youthifier 2.0, the 1.0 version only lasted 1 minute before the 2.0 was created, but there is a reason for this. It's quite annoying to adore an actor who's old enough you be your father, but part of the charm of an actor is their age, their intellect, so a Youthifier make them younger than they are, but leaves their mind, their mentality, their intellect where it is for their age which helps them you keep their awesome, part of it at least.
The first Youthifier was a doorway, one way through de-ages the person. The Youthifier 2.0 is a gun instead of a doorway, so you point and shoot, causing the physicality of their body to get younger.
Regretfully this is only for flings. A few hours hanging out. Truthfully, I wouldn't want long term interaction, but for a while it would be quite fun, but they have the right to be as awesome and sexy as always, so they must be returned at some point, so I'd need an Ager to return things back to normal.
Okay, so I'm watching Batman at the moment, but my question is why does the Riddler give Batman clues to foil him? I mean, it's like Superman telling Lex Luther 'Hi, just so you know, whenever you decide to kick my ass just surround me in Kryptonite <3'>
New question, how the fuck does Batman just know 64 squared off the top of his head? [4096, if you're curious] Don't ask why I'm so hyper critical at the moment, but what I'm saying is true. If the Riddler really wanted Gordon to die, or whatever, he wouldn't have brought Batman back.
Back to the jaw thing, cap him in his face. I mean they catch him and tie him up all the time, but never manage to kill him. Batman had living chess long before Harry Potter did.
So, back to the whole movie thing, well, the Youthifier first. It'd be fun, but then again I've also said I'd be fine with just a general conversation with various celebrities. The Youthifier would be for...something else. Not too dirty, but it would be nice. Less guilty for making out and the like. But seriously, a conversation would be fun, I'd even let them ask the questions. Let them know what they would about me instead of me knowing what I would about them. Unless they wanted to just tell me about every aspect of their lives that I would think of questioning.
The whole inspiration for the Youthifier came from waking up this morning and trying to not feel guilty about feeling attracted to someone twice my age. Then I decided to make them my age and I figured out how. The Youthifier, a doorway to making them my age, but keeping their mind and everything they know that makes them sexy.
After logically thinking that getting someone to walk through a random fuck doorway and not walking through with them it needed an upgrade into something a lot more logical to be using, so I made it into a gun instead. The Youthifier 2.0. At some point there may be a 3.0, but I don't know. I kind of want to draw it in action, too bad I can't draw real people with the skill it requires for them to look like whoever I'm trying to draw.
I had some other movie obsessiveness, but Batman distracted me, and now I can't remember what else I was going to say. But still, 'yay' for sexy actors. Wow, this is more something like I'd post in LJ, this gets to go to LJ anyway. Fuck it
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
Firstly, I love movie commentary. If I buy my camera [and I will, dammit!] whatever movies I make will feature commentary, mine and Za's since she'll probably be in half of what I make, and whoever else wants to comment on my videos.
Commentary is fun, it tells a lot about the behind the scenes of a movie and if there is character/actor commentary and not just director and writer commentary, it's even better. Actor commentary is the most fun because they're usually incredibly vain, or their general reaction to their fellow actor's performances. You learn a lot about the actors themselves and they just enhance the fun of the movie.
One of my other things about movies are how much fun is sounds like the actors have on set. The jokes and such. I guess it's the same general bullshit that happens between me and my friends, but it just sounds like so much fun, and for it to be on video, that's like a second bit of awesome and amazing because all that shit you say off the top of your head, you can hear it again later and it just plain sounds like fun.
Over on facebook my status says/said I wanted a youthifier. Actually, I want the Youthifier 2.0, the 1.0 version only lasted 1 minute before the 2.0 was created, but there is a reason for this. It's quite annoying to adore an actor who's old enough you be your father, but part of the charm of an actor is their age, their intellect, so a Youthifier make them younger than they are, but leaves their mind, their mentality, their intellect where it is for their age which helps them you keep their awesome, part of it at least.
The first Youthifier was a doorway, one way through de-ages the person. The Youthifier 2.0 is a gun instead of a doorway, so you point and shoot, causing the physicality of their body to get younger.
Regretfully this is only for flings. A few hours hanging out. Truthfully, I wouldn't want long term interaction, but for a while it would be quite fun, but they have the right to be as awesome and sexy as always, so they must be returned at some point, so I'd need an Ager to return things back to normal.
Okay, so I'm watching Batman at the moment, but my question is why does the Riddler give Batman clues to foil him? I mean, it's like Superman telling Lex Luther 'Hi, just so you know, whenever you decide to kick my ass just surround me in Kryptonite <3'>
New question, how the fuck does Batman just know 64 squared off the top of his head? [4096, if you're curious] Don't ask why I'm so hyper critical at the moment, but what I'm saying is true. If the Riddler really wanted Gordon to die, or whatever, he wouldn't have brought Batman back.
Back to the jaw thing, cap him in his face. I mean they catch him and tie him up all the time, but never manage to kill him. Batman had living chess long before Harry Potter did.
So, back to the whole movie thing, well, the Youthifier first. It'd be fun, but then again I've also said I'd be fine with just a general conversation with various celebrities. The Youthifier would be for...something else. Not too dirty, but it would be nice. Less guilty for making out and the like. But seriously, a conversation would be fun, I'd even let them ask the questions. Let them know what they would about me instead of me knowing what I would about them. Unless they wanted to just tell me about every aspect of their lives that I would think of questioning.
The whole inspiration for the Youthifier came from waking up this morning and trying to not feel guilty about feeling attracted to someone twice my age. Then I decided to make them my age and I figured out how. The Youthifier, a doorway to making them my age, but keeping their mind and everything they know that makes them sexy.
After logically thinking that getting someone to walk through a random fuck doorway and not walking through with them it needed an upgrade into something a lot more logical to be using, so I made it into a gun instead. The Youthifier 2.0. At some point there may be a 3.0, but I don't know. I kind of want to draw it in action, too bad I can't draw real people with the skill it requires for them to look like whoever I'm trying to draw.
I had some other movie obsessiveness, but Batman distracted me, and now I can't remember what else I was going to say. But still, 'yay' for sexy actors. Wow, this is more something like I'd post in LJ, this gets to go to LJ anyway. Fuck it
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 25, 2008
Happy Day
Oh, God! I’m in scuh a good mood right now. I got the position I wanted at the USBG and I have my badge and such to get into the Staff areas and such. It’s all sorts of fuck awesome and amazing.
I get home today and watch Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang. Pure gold and black comedy love everywhere! Alex called and we hung out, diner then watched KKBB. Awesome sauce, bitches.
Only area of suck was when I broke my nail. I only care when it hurts. This one ripped from the nail bed, but thankfully no blood. Not as bad as being electrocuted through one’s balls, thankfully I’ll never have the chance to ever have to feel that. Ever. But my thumb hurts a might fine bit from it bending. I swear, my nails only give me trouble when they’re short.
Amusingly enough, Word didn’t know how to spell ‘cunt’…now it does :evil grin:
Adios for now:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 20, 2008
Fanart
Why is there so much hero worship for fanart? I swear, almost anytime I post some half assed piece of fan art of anything remotely popular it gets more views than anything else in my gallery in less then 30 minutes and it gets a whole lot of faves. I don't care that muhc about fan art so I rarely draw any, and I purposefully try not to because it gets faves because people like what it's of and not how well it's been drawn. I posted two half assed drawings of Neku from 'The World Ends With You' on my dA account and in less than 5 minutes one of the images had 28 views and 4 faves. Hell, it's a photo taken with my camera and not eve a proper scan. They were doodles because I liked his character design, but what I want to know is why do people love a character so much that anything related to their appearance gets automatic fawning and love. I've seen a lot of Iron Man, from doodles to serious images that I have not favorited just because of who it was. I know not everything needs to be amazing, but why am I told that my half assed doodles are amazing and that something I seirously took time on doesn't get the time of day. Sure, I know I haven't posted a lot of real art work that's been done by me and half of that's because they're sketches and my scanner isn't working so photos of blue lines don't come out all that well. I just wish that things I cared about got more respect and at least a comment than they do. I don't want to rope in watchers and faves just because of fanart because I'm not a fanartist, I'm an originalist and I want my original work to get the respect it deserves. Adios for now :salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
--
short and dirty rant. probably originally posted at dA - Mar 28
Jasmine P.
--
short and dirty rant. probably originally posted at dA - Mar 28
Flintstone Syndrome
I'm sure Holllywerid has some other name for this, but that is a common enough reference point for what I'm brining up this morning [it being 1.22 am as of starting this]
What I'm talking about is how the hell do fat bastards like Homer Simpson, Peter Griffin, Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble, to name a few, end up marrying intelligent enough and attractive enough women suck as Marge, Lois, Wilma and Betty? Those women are frigging MILFs and you know it. They still have figures and brains after getting married and after three kids in some cases they shouldn't sitll have.
But my point is what the fuck is Hollyweird, Hanna-Barberra, Fox etc, saying about women? Everybody knows they want somebody attractive, and I understand there are more than one sort of attractive, but some of these are real long shorts. My inspiration and true complaint comes from an article on Yahoo news about unlikely couples in these summer movies and older movies.
http://movies.yahoo.com/summer-movies/The-Love-Guru/1809932977/photos/370/9621/#info
What I'm saying is, yes, I want a fun guy who's great to hang out with and blahddy-blahddy-blah, but why can't he be attractive? What is this saying about the choices women in movie land have with picking someone to marry. These guys are jobless losers who get into serious relationships or even marriage with a brillient bombshell of a woman who chances are probably wouldn't all look at these guys.
I'm not trying ot shoot down the Average Joes of the world, I'm just asking Hollywood to make a realistic movie whee the leading lady and the leading man are of some sort of equal status of wealth and intelligence. I know not every ugly person is married to another ugly person and that not every stupid person is married to another stupid person, but give me a bit of reality every now and again.
My argument goes both ways for ugly women getting with gorgeous men, but I can't think of that one happening too often. What I'm also tired of is seeing every 50+ actor marrying/fucking ever 22 year old actress [and vice versa]. If two characters have an age difference, keep the actors in line with that too because sometimes it gets weird to listen to commentary and hear that some actress or actor grew up watching somebody they admired as a kid and now they're in a sexual relationship with "them" due to the parts they play.
I'm not saying there aren't actors old enough to be my father that I don't think are attractive [there are plenty of them.] but that doesn't mean that if I ever get eh chance ot meet them that I'd want to fuck them, or act like I was. Part of what makes them alluring is their age and their talent. Yes, I think they're attractive, but no, I'd never want to date them for many reasons other than the fact that they're fucking old enough to be my parent. There are also actors around my age whom I find attractive, but at this moment they don't have the presence that age and skill births. In twenty years when I'm married they'll possibly inhabit the same qualities I find attractive about actors of the same age right now, but that's an issue for the future.
May looping arguement says this. Match characters realistically and hapilly with characters from their social ranks. If you're going to have a lovable loser, match them with some sort of bohemian. Have the girl next door grow up to be a bombshell of a woman who marries someone who is just as pretty and intelligent as she is, have them be happy.
I'm not saying don't stir the waters every now and again, but staying within the realms of reality every now and again also help the self esteem of regular people and their dream of finding a realistic love and not just a fantasy. Those of you reading this know me well enough to know that I love and live outside of this reality and have no issue with accepting things that aren't 'normal' but I also appreciate the reality in a situation, the possibility that It's not all that long of a shot for something to happen.
Oh yeah, the initial point of this is what are these movies saying about a woman's ability to choose a successful mate? I understand people want to all live in a fairytale happy ending with someone who's fun and women want ti be in charge of the relationship, but sometimes they need someone who has more then they do to lean on.
Other notable movies and tv shows that showcase the Flintstone Syndrome as far as I can remember are: The Honeymooners, Love & Sex, As Good As It Gets, Something New, etc. There are a million others out there, but I can't list half of 'em. Too tired, too late. But think about it: in many romantic comedies the brilliant/rich lead falls in love with a lovable/poor loser. It doesn't always happen like that, so why in Hollyfake? I know movies are a serious source of escapism from the realities of life but why everyone? [i have my own arguments for others medias that showcase this habit or similar habits, but that's for another note/journal of it's own]
[1.52am]
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
What I'm talking about is how the hell do fat bastards like Homer Simpson, Peter Griffin, Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble, to name a few, end up marrying intelligent enough and attractive enough women suck as Marge, Lois, Wilma and Betty? Those women are frigging MILFs and you know it. They still have figures and brains after getting married and after three kids in some cases they shouldn't sitll have.
But my point is what the fuck is Hollyweird, Hanna-Barberra, Fox etc, saying about women? Everybody knows they want somebody attractive, and I understand there are more than one sort of attractive, but some of these are real long shorts. My inspiration and true complaint comes from an article on Yahoo news about unlikely couples in these summer movies and older movies.
http://movies.yahoo.com/summer-movies/The-Love-Guru/1809932977/photos/370/9621/#info
What I'm saying is, yes, I want a fun guy who's great to hang out with and blahddy-blahddy-blah, but why can't he be attractive? What is this saying about the choices women in movie land have with picking someone to marry. These guys are jobless losers who get into serious relationships or even marriage with a brillient bombshell of a woman who chances are probably wouldn't all look at these guys.
I'm not trying ot shoot down the Average Joes of the world, I'm just asking Hollywood to make a realistic movie whee the leading lady and the leading man are of some sort of equal status of wealth and intelligence. I know not every ugly person is married to another ugly person and that not every stupid person is married to another stupid person, but give me a bit of reality every now and again.
My argument goes both ways for ugly women getting with gorgeous men, but I can't think of that one happening too often. What I'm also tired of is seeing every 50+ actor marrying/fucking ever 22 year old actress [and vice versa]. If two characters have an age difference, keep the actors in line with that too because sometimes it gets weird to listen to commentary and hear that some actress or actor grew up watching somebody they admired as a kid and now they're in a sexual relationship with "them" due to the parts they play.
I'm not saying there aren't actors old enough to be my father that I don't think are attractive [there are plenty of them.] but that doesn't mean that if I ever get eh chance ot meet them that I'd want to fuck them, or act like I was. Part of what makes them alluring is their age and their talent. Yes, I think they're attractive, but no, I'd never want to date them for many reasons other than the fact that they're fucking old enough to be my parent. There are also actors around my age whom I find attractive, but at this moment they don't have the presence that age and skill births. In twenty years when I'm married they'll possibly inhabit the same qualities I find attractive about actors of the same age right now, but that's an issue for the future.
May looping arguement says this. Match characters realistically and hapilly with characters from their social ranks. If you're going to have a lovable loser, match them with some sort of bohemian. Have the girl next door grow up to be a bombshell of a woman who marries someone who is just as pretty and intelligent as she is, have them be happy.
I'm not saying don't stir the waters every now and again, but staying within the realms of reality every now and again also help the self esteem of regular people and their dream of finding a realistic love and not just a fantasy. Those of you reading this know me well enough to know that I love and live outside of this reality and have no issue with accepting things that aren't 'normal' but I also appreciate the reality in a situation, the possibility that It's not all that long of a shot for something to happen.
Oh yeah, the initial point of this is what are these movies saying about a woman's ability to choose a successful mate? I understand people want to all live in a fairytale happy ending with someone who's fun and women want ti be in charge of the relationship, but sometimes they need someone who has more then they do to lean on.
Other notable movies and tv shows that showcase the Flintstone Syndrome as far as I can remember are: The Honeymooners, Love & Sex, As Good As It Gets, Something New, etc. There are a million others out there, but I can't list half of 'em. Too tired, too late. But think about it: in many romantic comedies the brilliant/rich lead falls in love with a lovable/poor loser. It doesn't always happen like that, so why in Hollyfake? I know movies are a serious source of escapism from the realities of life but why everyone? [i have my own arguments for others medias that showcase this habit or similar habits, but that's for another note/journal of it's own]
[1.52am]
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 19, 2008
Gonzo.
I have so many avenues with which to start this. This is more than a movie review, this is gonzo, maybe not after declaring it is, or maybe it is even more so since I declare it so. I, Meister Jazz, retrieved my good acquaintance Senor Kovo from his domicile to accompany me to Silver Spring for a film festival previewing of Gonzo: The Life and Works of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson. I admire what the man was able to accomplish in his life and wish it hadn't had ended, but the world would be a much different place is his mind had continues to punch words to paper in his fashion.
The Dr. was brash, loud, booming, spastic, sincere, blunt, honest. These are qualities that I admire and wish to keep with me in my actions. Dr. Thompson was honest and kind when he needed to be. He didn't live for anything other than the moment and the people he was with. Everything was reality and fiction. Everything was captured on miles, leagues of film and tape. He recorded everything. Proof, reference for what happened in the haze that he lived in.
To the point and set in his ideas. The Dr. lived a life that no one else could handle and if he hadn't then the world would be different. If he had bee a traditional journalist he would not be so well known now. It's not those that follow the rules that history remembers, it's those that demand to be remembered in history by shaking things up, leaving it a mess and leaving it better than they found it. It's those that change the world they live in that are remembered, those that can prove just how mighty they were at their peak and will admit to just how weak they were when they fell.
I've been asked why I take so many photos of my acquaintances, why so many photos of what I do and where I am. It's so I can not only tell a story, but show it. If I don't have the pictures I try to recreate it as accurately as I can. It's all about the ride and being able to bring more people along the next time. I have tickets to share and the people to share them with, not let us all experience it. Love, hate, joy, pain, confusion, clarity, reality fiction. Meister Jazz and Kovo, of Jasmine and Alex. One and the same, yet both are real and both are fake. The proof is in who you talk to.
This is anything but Gonzo, and that's fine because this is mine. Only one person could accurately portray gonzo as it should have been and only one person could have written this. The right people for their occupations.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
The Dr. was brash, loud, booming, spastic, sincere, blunt, honest. These are qualities that I admire and wish to keep with me in my actions. Dr. Thompson was honest and kind when he needed to be. He didn't live for anything other than the moment and the people he was with. Everything was reality and fiction. Everything was captured on miles, leagues of film and tape. He recorded everything. Proof, reference for what happened in the haze that he lived in.
To the point and set in his ideas. The Dr. lived a life that no one else could handle and if he hadn't then the world would be different. If he had bee a traditional journalist he would not be so well known now. It's not those that follow the rules that history remembers, it's those that demand to be remembered in history by shaking things up, leaving it a mess and leaving it better than they found it. It's those that change the world they live in that are remembered, those that can prove just how mighty they were at their peak and will admit to just how weak they were when they fell.
I've been asked why I take so many photos of my acquaintances, why so many photos of what I do and where I am. It's so I can not only tell a story, but show it. If I don't have the pictures I try to recreate it as accurately as I can. It's all about the ride and being able to bring more people along the next time. I have tickets to share and the people to share them with, not let us all experience it. Love, hate, joy, pain, confusion, clarity, reality fiction. Meister Jazz and Kovo, of Jasmine and Alex. One and the same, yet both are real and both are fake. The proof is in who you talk to.
This is anything but Gonzo, and that's fine because this is mine. Only one person could accurately portray gonzo as it should have been and only one person could have written this. The right people for their occupations.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 17, 2008
Dream
My dreams decide to incorporate the oddest things sometimes.
Take this dream from today. I took a nap at about noon, then woke up about 2, it's a lot longer than i intended, but weird things happened. Part of my dream was a video game. Part of the game was inspired by Mario 64, but I can't remember the rest. Then I'm going out to dinner with Miguel, Dad, Ari, a girl who is a weird combination of Sam L and Za and Dorien. We're talking about whatever then Dad chides me for not having my phone with me because he called me. Coincidentally this is one of the few times I didn't have my phone right next to my ear that I happen to be bitched at about it. Then there's another part of the dream where Migs is bitching me out about smoking because he found a cigar band and somehow forgot I'm old enough to smoke. He found either the bad or my cutter. This happened on the way to dinner. It was weird. Nothing made much sense. Funny thing is I go to check my phone and it's flashing I think 'Oh, someone actually called me. It's probably a text from Dorien' and it's a call from Glenn and I think 'Fucking weird. This reminds me of that dream I just had.
Yeah...that's what happened. I don't know why I was so pressed to write it up, but I was. I left a voice message reply, and about fifteen minutes after I realized what would have been the funniest thing to leave as a response. I'll have to use it some other time. And I have an amusing bit of something to tell Alex. So many thoughts and nobody to hear them. :(
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
Take this dream from today. I took a nap at about noon, then woke up about 2, it's a lot longer than i intended, but weird things happened. Part of my dream was a video game. Part of the game was inspired by Mario 64, but I can't remember the rest. Then I'm going out to dinner with Miguel, Dad, Ari, a girl who is a weird combination of Sam L and Za and Dorien. We're talking about whatever then Dad chides me for not having my phone with me because he called me. Coincidentally this is one of the few times I didn't have my phone right next to my ear that I happen to be bitched at about it. Then there's another part of the dream where Migs is bitching me out about smoking because he found a cigar band and somehow forgot I'm old enough to smoke. He found either the bad or my cutter. This happened on the way to dinner. It was weird. Nothing made much sense. Funny thing is I go to check my phone and it's flashing I think 'Oh, someone actually called me. It's probably a text from Dorien' and it's a call from Glenn and I think 'Fucking weird. This reminds me of that dream I just had.
Yeah...that's what happened. I don't know why I was so pressed to write it up, but I was. I left a voice message reply, and about fifteen minutes after I realized what would have been the funniest thing to leave as a response. I'll have to use it some other time. And I have an amusing bit of something to tell Alex. So many thoughts and nobody to hear them. :(
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 14, 2008
Movies and Summer
'I'm getting...hungry. You won't like me if I'm hungry' :roffle:
I recently enjoyed The Incredible Hulk. Oh, that movie was so much fun, it's a 4/5. But how can I not love a movie starring Tim Roth and Edward Norton. And Robert Downey Jr. was there for a bit! Come the fuck on, 3 out of 4 of my favorite adult actors. AlL I need now is a movie that stars Downey, Norton, Roth and Johnny Depp. My god, that could be a very sexy, very amazing movie.
On the topic of favorite actors, I'm happily awaiting my new purchases that star Downey. I saw a part of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang earlier and decided I needed the entire thing unedited and bought it. I'm in a good enough mood at the moment. I've been pretty alone for the past week. Well, I mean, I've hung out with my brothers, but it's not the same socialization that I need which is the problem. I need people my age and people who understand me but until that happens I'll keep to myself. The only person who is guaranteed to be with me. Myself.
Well, this is not supposed to be a negative journal, so back to the happy.
I'm looking forward to and waiting for the following movies: gonzo: The Life and Works of Hunter S. Thompson, Hancock, The Dark Knight, Tropic Thunder, Watchmen, other. I can't remember them all at the moment. I seriously know there are others. This is the Summer of Movies for me apparently. 2007 was the Summer of Driving. Once I got my license all I did was drive around. I drove with Alex, I drove alone. It's all I did, drove somewhere and nowhere. 2008 is the Summer of Movies. I'm keeping track of how many movies in theaters, on DVD and how many box sets of TV shows I've watched. TV shows I think are only around 5. Theater Movies are 6 different movies, two have been viewed twice since I've been here, DVD and TV movies has got to be about 25+. I need something to do aside from read and watch movies.
My summer reading has so far included Wired Mag, Esquire Mag, Sin City 1-5, Iron Man: Beneath the Armor, Memnoch the Devil, Wizard 200 Mag, pt 1 and pt 2, and I've partially read Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns, By the Sword, The Vampire Armand, there are others scattered everywhere. I pick up books all the time and can't remember them all.
I need to get away some time this week. I was spoiled last week :< :sigh: I'll get out at some point. And I seriously want to get down to Busch Gardens before summer's over. Before I move back to Norfolk. I guess I can wait without losing it longer. I'll just keep going to the movies. They help and are fucking entertaining.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
I recently enjoyed The Incredible Hulk. Oh, that movie was so much fun, it's a 4/5. But how can I not love a movie starring Tim Roth and Edward Norton. And Robert Downey Jr. was there for a bit! Come the fuck on, 3 out of 4 of my favorite adult actors. AlL I need now is a movie that stars Downey, Norton, Roth and Johnny Depp. My god, that could be a very sexy, very amazing movie.
On the topic of favorite actors, I'm happily awaiting my new purchases that star Downey. I saw a part of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang earlier and decided I needed the entire thing unedited and bought it. I'm in a good enough mood at the moment. I've been pretty alone for the past week. Well, I mean, I've hung out with my brothers, but it's not the same socialization that I need which is the problem. I need people my age and people who understand me but until that happens I'll keep to myself. The only person who is guaranteed to be with me. Myself.
Well, this is not supposed to be a negative journal, so back to the happy.
I'm looking forward to and waiting for the following movies: gonzo: The Life and Works of Hunter S. Thompson, Hancock, The Dark Knight, Tropic Thunder, Watchmen, other. I can't remember them all at the moment. I seriously know there are others. This is the Summer of Movies for me apparently. 2007 was the Summer of Driving. Once I got my license all I did was drive around. I drove with Alex, I drove alone. It's all I did, drove somewhere and nowhere. 2008 is the Summer of Movies. I'm keeping track of how many movies in theaters, on DVD and how many box sets of TV shows I've watched. TV shows I think are only around 5. Theater Movies are 6 different movies, two have been viewed twice since I've been here, DVD and TV movies has got to be about 25+. I need something to do aside from read and watch movies.
My summer reading has so far included Wired Mag, Esquire Mag, Sin City 1-5, Iron Man: Beneath the Armor, Memnoch the Devil, Wizard 200 Mag, pt 1 and pt 2, and I've partially read Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns, By the Sword, The Vampire Armand, there are others scattered everywhere. I pick up books all the time and can't remember them all.
I need to get away some time this week. I was spoiled last week :< :sigh: I'll get out at some point. And I seriously want to get down to Busch Gardens before summer's over. Before I move back to Norfolk. I guess I can wait without losing it longer. I'll just keep going to the movies. They help and are fucking entertaining.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 6, 2008
Two Halves of Something Broken
Two Halves of a Whole.
Something broken, this is actually at a perspective, so the smaller piece is smaller on purpose. But there is a purpose to this.
My point is, I'm tired of my social situation changing so drastically every time it does. I'm tired of rebounding back and forth from being independent to being dependent on others. I can stand on my own, and I can lean on another's shoulder, but I'm tired of being forced to do one or the other over and over again. Every time I learn to live with myself I'm thrown into a situation where there are others who tolerate and accept me. I'm around people who don't ask anything other than me. They they let me trust them, until we're forced apart, then I'm alone and have forgotten how to deal with anything anymore.
There's nothing wrong with my desire for stability, so why don't I have any? Have I don't something to be punished to not be allowed to have any real consistent presence in my life that I trust and whom trusts me. This person doesn't even need to be a boyfriend, a significant other. They just need to be reliable. I need someone to be reliable when we're together and when we're apart.
Is it weird that when I'm alone I'm both incredibly solitary, not wanting to be anywhere near nor around others, but I'm also quite clingy, wanted to be near certain people? That's why I am the way I am when I can finally be not alone anymore. I'm like a man in the desert who'se come across and oasis. I lavish in the attention I can now get and give. I'm a selfish son of a bitch so my receiving and giving of attention in a weird way involve my sharing my new artwork with people. I like hearing from others that my work is good. That doesn't quite mean much because none of them draw. But that doesn't mean I don't not like hearing it. I love giving attention to others in my own obsessive way. I love giving attention in a physical manner, hugging, touching or in general being around some one else, others. That's how I give attention when I don't always listen properly. I focus, observe watch. That's how I give attention, that's how I give as much as and what I get.
My broken heart is cause by many people. Too many to list here, too many to list for myself. IT's quote sad though that Just about every one I know can be put on that list from one time or another. There is also a reason why I go off on my own when I'm upset. It forces me to think about the situation and it forces me to find a way to fix it. How can I fix something that I didn't break? Something that isn't tangible? Something that is left subject to others to socialize with? What happens is not under my own control, but it's under the control of those around me and it's taken so many 'hits' over the years that everything is an injury on top of a bleeding wound. Nothing is getting better and I don't know how much more I can take before it all collapses. I need something stronger and more consistent that my own strength. One day I'll just cave in on myself under my own weaknesses and I won't be strong enough to get out on my own. Maybe by that day My needed strength will be near and they'll be able to help me out when I won't want to help myself.
I can only pray for that day.
Jasmine P.
June 5, 2008
Island
Damn my hormones, but this is also a truth of sorts. At this moment I am weak. I can't help it, but I stay as strong as I can.
I am an island. I trust no one because they never keep their promises. I've been left on my own so often, I might as well not seek oit others. I might as well as stay on my own and live by my own strength.
That makes me wonder about why I try to rely on others. There is no one here for me but me. There is no one I can trust with anything so why bother? Why should I look to others for help when they don't help me. I shouldn't. I should keep to myself and not bother dealing with anyone else. Other people only forsake and anger me. They don't do as they say and they leave me depressed when I try to fight it.
Is there any reason to fight it, well, aside from the tears. Those are quite annoying. But other than that, is there any reason to not just internalize everything? Probably not. No one will be here forever and few are there when I need them. There's only me.
This needs to be said. Fuck all hormones to high heaven and low hell. I ought to feel better in about two days. I've been feeling so good too, aside from the caffeine and sugar cravings, I've been coping quite well and I've been well in general.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
I am an island. I trust no one because they never keep their promises. I've been left on my own so often, I might as well not seek oit others. I might as well as stay on my own and live by my own strength.
That makes me wonder about why I try to rely on others. There is no one here for me but me. There is no one I can trust with anything so why bother? Why should I look to others for help when they don't help me. I shouldn't. I should keep to myself and not bother dealing with anyone else. Other people only forsake and anger me. They don't do as they say and they leave me depressed when I try to fight it.
Is there any reason to fight it, well, aside from the tears. Those are quite annoying. But other than that, is there any reason to not just internalize everything? Probably not. No one will be here forever and few are there when I need them. There's only me.
This needs to be said. Fuck all hormones to high heaven and low hell. I ought to feel better in about two days. I've been feeling so good too, aside from the caffeine and sugar cravings, I've been coping quite well and I've been well in general.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 4, 2008
Trying Not to Lose It
For once this isn't depression based dementia...loss of control rather.
We got some mail today, it was addressed to the Estate of Pat P. our om, the estate of our mom, which is the three of us. There was also one addressed to Dorien and my Aunt, who are Trustees of the estate. I opened one of them, quite curious to see what it was about, and I don't think I like what it said. I hope to high heavel and low fucking hell that I read it wrong. Details are unnecessary here, but those whom I trust enough with this information will get it prior to the consequences that I'm in fear of.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
We got some mail today, it was addressed to the Estate of Pat P. our om, the estate of our mom, which is the three of us. There was also one addressed to Dorien and my Aunt, who are Trustees of the estate. I opened one of them, quite curious to see what it was about, and I don't think I like what it said. I hope to high heavel and low fucking hell that I read it wrong. Details are unnecessary here, but those whom I trust enough with this information will get it prior to the consequences that I'm in fear of.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 2, 2008
Pure Friggin Sex!
After finishing Iron Man: Beneath The Armor and learning that Adi Granov designed the suit that the Mark 3 in the movie is based off of, and now finding his art online, all I can say is that it's all pure sex and full of awesome and amazing and I can't stare at it or drool enough. Timeto save some references, and some of these images are large enough to be wallpapers. Gold! Sex! Amazing! I'm in love with his art, And Phil Saunders did an amazing job transcribing Granov's style for the movie. Seeing how everything is put together and comes apart is something that's I've wanted to see, and I think this knowledge will help in my my future pursuits of designing my own red-and-gold. I mostly want to just try my hand at it, since it's not really in my realm of style and design this is going to be pretty damn tricky, but I do like my head and mask designs that I've doodled out so far, so from here is the rest of the body. I might just have to do this in parts, try turn arounds for the parts then see what I can do from there. I also think I might try asking Saunders for his advice or tips for drawing such a technological suit.
Before I forget this, What I like about Adi's Armor is that it's not extra stream lined. There are part that come out, everything can not be contained within the outline. There is the muscle line, then there are the weapons that move outside of the outline. Everything for the most part is streamlined, but there is also a slew of gorgeous detail on everything that makes me want to touch the page to feel the texture. The grainy aspect that the suit has is also strong and excellent. It's not a smooth coloring, but a rough feeling of everything that is there. There is a tangible quality to the images that I can't get enough of.
Now, after that milieu of praise for Adi's designs and Phil's recreations, here are some links for future reference of all that is awesome ...in relation to this post.
http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?p=1756452
http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=124921
http://philsaunders.blogspot.com/
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
Before I forget this, What I like about Adi's Armor is that it's not extra stream lined. There are part that come out, everything can not be contained within the outline. There is the muscle line, then there are the weapons that move outside of the outline. Everything for the most part is streamlined, but there is also a slew of gorgeous detail on everything that makes me want to touch the page to feel the texture. The grainy aspect that the suit has is also strong and excellent. It's not a smooth coloring, but a rough feeling of everything that is there. There is a tangible quality to the images that I can't get enough of.
Now, after that milieu of praise for Adi's designs and Phil's recreations, here are some links for future reference of all that is awesome ...in relation to this post.
http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?p=1756452
http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=124921
http://philsaunders.blogspot.com/
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
June 1, 2008
Too Similar
How often is it that two people who never knew each other and never had the chance of knowing each other end up meeting, once they do have the chance of meeting and knowing each other, but then seem to have endless personality similarities?
I guess knowing or not knowing one another doesn't necessarily have anything to do with their personalities, but how often is it that two people meet who seem to share the same type of personality. They think of themselves one way and people around them disagree with hoe they categorize themselves. They have similar interests, to a degree. They have minor habits that have similarities.
I don't quite know nor remember where I wanted to go with this line of thinking. I was just curious about possibility of the commonalities that two people could have. I don't know anymore. Forget I contemplated anything.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
I guess knowing or not knowing one another doesn't necessarily have anything to do with their personalities, but how often is it that two people meet who seem to share the same type of personality. They think of themselves one way and people around them disagree with hoe they categorize themselves. They have similar interests, to a degree. They have minor habits that have similarities.
I don't quite know nor remember where I wanted to go with this line of thinking. I was just curious about possibility of the commonalities that two people could have. I don't know anymore. Forget I contemplated anything.
Adios for now
:salute and bow:
Jasmine P.
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